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over the cold.. August 28, 2010

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2 weeks , lots of sleep, feeds every night and a presciption of antibiotics and im over my cold! i was feeling pretty crappy and couldnt be bothered to do anything and ive hauled my ass out of bed to do some crafts, washing and chill out. i had a week of feeling very heavy on the chest and strugling to get any kinda air up my nose! (despite using a sniffer) but with the help of some vapour rub under my nose i was finally able to sleep after 3 days of being awake coughing and spluttering! Ive almost finsihed my antibioitcs and im still feeling tired from it all but feeling much better than i did! 🙂 Having the feed on every night helped me too because I hardly ate while i had the cold as the coughing took its toll on my swallowing.. so only after a week of feeds eating nothing i started off eating yogurts and jelly to go down easy and get my swallowing stronger.
only bad news is my mums now caught the cold aw…
it hasnt been much of a summer with all the rain so the cold has been a factor with me and ive had to stay wrapped up nice and warm!
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Stinking cold… August 11, 2010

Posted by loz121 in Uncategorized.
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Sorry I’ve not blogged for a bit. Me n Mum have been trying to sort out the brow suspension date out. I’ve also caught a summer cold which isnt sitting well with me at mo. I’m not sleeping very well because of the blocked nose, sweats and basically feeling crap! I have my birthday on Saturday too! So I’m hoping it will be gone or at least a bit better by then. I’ve been putting my feed on every night to ensure I can fight it quicker as well. Due to having no sleep my eyes look even bloody smaller! But i guess that what 2 nights of no sleep does to you! I’ve got a chesty cough but I should be ok because ive got a good cough to cough out any horrible stuff! Whereas when I got pneumonia I was little as 5 stone and very weak so I couldnt fight that off. My parents have reassured me that as long as I got a good strong cough i will be fine 🙂
I can be a worry wart at times urgh…

Drifitng… July 26, 2010

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Sometimes I feel like friends are dfifting away from me, I mean I talk to some of them on MSN and things like that ocassionally but some i havent talked to for a while. I know they can’t help being busy and getting on with their lives and jobs and it takes a few weeks or months to organize a get together.
I spend a lot of time on my own at home and only mostly get out only for appointmetns to hospital or things like that. i try and keep myslef busy at home doing crafts or things like that, I’ve even taken up pen=paling just so i can get ou of the house to post the letter! Something to movitvate me to walk the 10 mins there and 10 mins back from the post box. Mum said that’s all l need just to excercise my legs and keep them moving. it seems when I walk on my own, I walk FASTER I walk slow there but then I start up walking faster on the way back because my heart is pumping a bit too much due to the lack of energy in my body and i get a bit breathless by the time i reach back home! It’s like the faster I walk, the faster i get there and have a break. But it’s all good! Keeps my mind busy too! Having too much time on your hands can make you go a bit crazy to say the least!
and in other stories, I saw the finished result picture of my friend’s eyelid op, now the bruising and swelling has gone, it looks quite good. I’m looking forward to the finished result of mine although not to the actual operations!! The first is all orgnaised at the moment so hopefully things will go alriight!!

Yorkshire Sculpture Park… July 15, 2010

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Yesterday, I was woken early by mum (yes I get woken by MUM alarm!) I have had vibrating alarms in the past and I always switched them off! However, I DID get a fire alarm vibrating alarm for my bed which would defo wake me which I hope never goes off because it means theres theres a FIRE! Anyway, I was woken by mum because it was PEG change day, it hurt a bit more coming out today even though it wasn’t a studen nurse, it hurt because around the PEG site was sore. It does that occasionally and needs some kinda steriod cream on the skin around it. It didn’t hurt that much though and it was quick.

After I recovered from that, parents asked if I wanted to go toYorkshire Sculpture park and get out of the house for a bit. I was a bit grumbly because I was tired, but i went anyway and saw some awesome style sculptures which were all spread out over a few acres of land, It was just about warm to go round for a walk and take some pics. I moaned a bit with all the walking we did becuase it was a longggg walk for my little weak legs to cope. Mum did offer to get a wheel chair from reception but stubborn me said “no, I’ll be ok”. SO today my legs are sore when I walk about. Anyway, I’ve learnt my lesson. If its gonna be al long day out, dont refuse a wheelchair! We have a trip to London coming up soon, so parents hired a wheelchair for those long days out. Beats me moaning that I’m geting tired and want to go back to the hotel and ruin my parents day out?

Fears for my Cochlear implant…. July 14, 2010

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Don’t get me wrong. I’m proud to be a cochlear implant wearer and would even say it’s a part of me now but despite this and BEACAUSE of this, I just cannot go out in public with my Cochlear implant on show. I’m always scared that someone will pinch it, i know it’s stupid but I love my cochlear implant too much too lose it and I can’t do without it. I wear it 24/7 *apart from bed and bath* as any of my friends nad family know. I was quite confident wearing it when I was a teenager at college but I had an icident in my town where when I was wearing a baseball hat and this awful girl came from behind and nicked my hat right from my head and went over to her mates and played with it on her head showing off. As she snatched my hat from my head, my Cochlear implant nearly went wth it as i had my hair in a pony tail. I had the confidence to go ask for it back but my confidence was a bit shaken when I nearly lost the cochlear implant so ever since I’ve worn my hair down when I’m out and about in town. Might I was with my 2nd implant too. I’ve always been scared of losing the outer part of the cochlear implant. If i did, i would be in such a panic!!! Id be so lost without it even for one day! It would be nice to be able to show off my cochlear implant whenever I was out and about and show how proud I am to wear it and I hope i can sometime in the future. This cochlear implant has changed my life for the better and I really don’t know where I’d be without it. One thing is for sure though, my life would so very different if my parents never implanted me in1994 when i was just 9.
I also rememeber the fear when my CI surgeon told me I’d lost the first one. I wondered how I’d cope without it and a million things rushed through my head as he was talking. Even If it was only a month til i was reimplanted in the other ear, i think what helped me was having my friends at school coz I was only 15 and i was grateful the school had a deaf base too so I had extra help. It has given me fears about losing my 2nd one though, although I know it’s unlikely because I now have my PEG and I’m getting my vitamins and nutrients, so if i EVER got another ear infection, hopefully i’d be able to fight it off. I know I only lost the first one because I coucldnt fight off the infection because of my undiagnosed conditon but I should be able to now thanks to the PEG and the feeds I’m having and now that docs know about my mitochondrial conditon.
I know I am proud to be a CI wearer and I hope I’ll eventually get over hte fear of not being able to wear it in public places one day

My choice… July 7, 2010

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I have finally made my choice about the eyelid operation! I am going for it! I may as well do it if it’s going to be done sooner or later! The person who I was emailing about helped a lot and helepd me to make my choice. I’m still scared about the local but I’ve been through tougher things than a little prick on my forehead!!! SO I’ve given in to the docs as well. I know it will be good for me in the long run and help to look and see better. As you know, there’s stil a 6 week wait and we only called on Monday and we haven’t heard from the eye doc Mr Griffins yet so I assume he will send us a letter and let us know what day he will want us up in August sometime. I am prepared for everything that will happen, such as the local and the swelling and pain (which shouldnt be too bad! well i hope not anyway since i have to do this TWICE!) I will post pics although not too gruesome when I have had it done. I really couldn’t find ANYTHING to do with brow lift suspensions I am going to have on google. So hopefully people will know what a brow lift suspension actually does when I post pics! I have only ever found eyebrow lifts or brow lits on google but nothing like my eyelid lift ie the brow lift suspension. So I was happy to talk to someone who did but I’m kinda glad I didn’t find anything on google.There probably would have been things about it that put me off!! Anyway It will all be worthwhile in the end!

Friends’s op… June 28, 2010

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My friend emailed me yesterday and told me that his brow suspension lift operation went well and hes recovering at home now. He ‘s told me how it all went and how the pain and sweliling would be like etc..
He also said he would send me pics in a few days and see what it looks like. I am more worried about the swelling and the local which would sting than the actual operation! He said he had a problem due to some scarring on his forehead from a previous eyelid lift operation but he said as i dont have that, mine should be straightforward. I;m glad i have someone to talk to and tell me all about it. it makes me feel a bit more confident about doing it myself.

i am feeling i might actually do this! it’s scary but I feel it needs to be done for my vision to be better. Lately all i see is my world through my eyelashes and closing one eye! Im hoping it will make my vision less double vision-y too.

on other notes, I am enjoying the sunshine we are getting and i can just relax in the garden on our swing chair! I’ve actually had my cochlear implant stick to the bars a few times due to it being metal!! So i always sit in the middle!

The letter… June 24, 2010

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Got the letter from Newcastle from the eye doc explaining everything I already knew basically and when i read it, it gave me a few scary feelings. When he wrote I would experience bruising and swelling etc. i hate pain! and don’t get me started with having a local for it! It’s been in the running for 2 years now and I think this year may the year I finally go for it. JUST because I need it. I may not b looking forward to it but it has to be done!
the guy i have been writing to about the brow suspension will be having his op tomorrow. Im hoping he will tell me it doesnt hurt as much as it sounds! but ill wait til he gets back to me on it and then get the ball rolling. after all theres still 6 weeks to get all ready for it! ohh can u tell im freaking out about it??
Im sure ill be fine!

Strong again!,,, June 14, 2010

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I think i am now totally back to normal! WOO! I’m glad to be moving about more easily and no aches! Well apart from eyes because they have been going totally funny lately… like i have just washed my face and water hasn’t gone from my eyes yet then I either blink a few times or give them a rub to focus them again. I am seriously considering the eyelid op now because I’m fed up of not being able to see at times when they go all squinty, then I have to close one eye to focus too. It’s strange though because different days, its a different eye bothering me. If it’s not one eye, its the other! I’m still waiting on my friend who I emailed who is having the operation done at the end of June and as soon as he gives me a note of how it’s all gone, I’m just gonna go for it coz I’m sick of the docs asking and my mum saying how pretty my eyes would be if they were more open..
I’ve only just started eating the normal stuff I eat now after being on the feed pump every night since I came off the holiday so I’m pleased about that. Although I did have an incident where I nearly choked on a midget gem!! But I’m glad I was strong enough to cough it out!!! It sure made my eyes water!!
I’m also avoiding any football apart from the england matches! Go England! I dont see the point in watching the other matches though!! haha my brother is religiously watching it and has his wall chart! Also I’m so glad I cant hear those trumpet things everyone seems to be complaining about. My parents keep saying it sounds like a drone of bee’s but I seriously cant hear it! just the crowd noise on TV.
Right back to my crafty pieces!

Getting stronger… June 7, 2010

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i am getting stronger every day now, woo hoo i have been having my feed every night and going to bed early coz I am basically shattered of the energy I’ve been using up during the day. I am now able to walk about unaided and go up and down the stairs unaided which I am happy about because stairs scare me when I’m weak with no energy. I always seem to have one weak leg that might just ” go” if you know what i mean. i couldn’t even put my own cochlear implant on because I couldn’t lift my arms up enough to do it. I can do it now thankfully. Mum never knows where the magnet actually goes and with the hair in the way, the coil kept falling off!
I haven’t managed to eat anything full yet apart from the usual water and jelly which is making me frustrated because I want to get back to eating something yummy such as my cakes and snacks! At the moment, i tried a skip * the crisp snack type* earlier but it didn’t go well as I coughed when I swallowed it. So I tried a custard yogurt and that went down more easily. I have some antibiotics to clear anything on my chest that might stop me swallowing properly. I’m still happy that I can have my cuppa tea though ahh even if it is through a straw! Its been a frustrating couple of days, but I’m getting somewhere now! ON my feet and doing what I usually do! 😀 Thank god for my family and the bf! Dunno what i’d do without them!